Monday

Monday.

I probably don’t need to say any more than that.

What is it about this particular day of the week which makes you wake up wishing there had been a massive nuclear episode and you were the sole survivor?

There’s probably some science stuff that explains it, but then again it would more than likely be bollocks anyway.

If you work Monday to Friday it’s understandable. You probably get every single weekend off and spend the 64 hours between work days wisely by pushing your liver to breaking point, ordering pizza and watching films in your pants (the films aren’t in your pants). Of course you don’t want such epic times to come to an end.

But what about those who don’t get weekends off?

I currently work seven days a week and the weekend is my busiest time. Monday is actually one of the days when I get to take it a bit easier, but I still awoke this morning feeling a crippling disappointment that I didn’t die peacefully during the night.

Your social media feeds are doubtlessly full of “Monday – meh” posts and “hilarious” memes of people in varying forms of distress with some comment about Monday being a bit crap.

Bob Geldof makes a pound every time someone says something bad about Monday, the tax-dodging bastard.

So even though Monday is the toffee penny in a week of Quality Street, keep it under your hat.

Tomorrow will probably be even shitter anyway.